January 2024
In the year of two thousand and twenty four, I am making the intention of slowing down and recounting each month. Thanking myself for going through it and making it out the other side. Noting patterns and trends, either good or bad, so that I can make adjustments in my life. Watching the growth in month-long increments, and cherishing the moments that made my heart smile. Imagine eating at a big buffet and not pausing to taste each dish you put on your plate. How would you know what you like, what you don’t, what else you want to try, and when you’ve had enough of one dish? We need to savor the moments. Introspection is, in my opinion, a very beneficial tool to living a life happy with yourself.
Table of Contents
1.Recap | 2.Lessons | 3.Challenge | 4.Summary
1. Recap
I shall start with a highlight reel of the month of January. I started out with an old friend at a NYE party that was Gatsby gala-themed… 10/10 recommend. I finally tried pilates, which is tons of fun, but I can’t justify the insane membership costs. I hung out with an old friend from high school twice, which was nice to catch up. I got another piercing and now feel like my right ear is complete haha. The difficult week was back on Bonaire, seeing friends and being reminded of the life I don’t have right now. I realized that while that place and those people will always have my heart, I just simply can’t be on that plot of clay for a while. I need space to heal from those wounds. But while I was there, I hung out with friends, went snorkeling with the turtles, and had yummy food. I spent a day with some extended family and finally had Christmas with them. Went on a mini road trip with my brother for the day to get some paperwork done for our new hobby. Then I got a Japanese head spa treatment the same day I saw another friend that I haven’t seen in a while and was fully zen and content that day. I spent the weekend in Cabo to celebrate yet another old friend’s birthday, made some new friends, and hung out with another friend who now lives there. And lastly, I booked a flight that I’ve been dreaming about since October of last year. All in all, it was a packed, full, and fun month. Some tears were definitely involved, but it was a good release of emotions and allowed me to see what I need. So, there is thirty-one days in a paragraph.
2. Lessons
Another perspective on this month I want to focus on is my mental and emotional growth. Last year was not at all what I expected to have, but not entirely bad either. It ended with some major positives that I’m choosing to focus on rather than the alternatives. One of the biggest lessons I learned this month is about friendship. True friends put in the effort, similar to a romantic relationship. It’s a two-way street and both people need to work for the friendship to stay strong. Now, not everyone is meant to stay in your life, or at least not with the same strong bond, forever. And that’s okay. But realizing when to let go and let it be is difficult. I also struggle with feeling guilty, as if it’s all on me. So this month I started to realize that while I can leave those doors open, once the ball is in their court, there’s not much more I can do. I can’t torture myself into single-handedly trying to maintain that friendship. People change, priorities shift, lifestyles affect our perspectives. Those who truly love us will continue to make an effort to stay involved in our lives, just as we will for those we care about.
3. Challenge
This month, I tried to be a little more kind, a little more understanding, a little more sympathetic, a little more forgiving. Reminding myself that the life we all put out on social media is not the full story and we can’t possibly know everything someone is going through or what instigated a certain reaction from them. Our lives are messy, complicated, intertwined things. And that’s both wonderful and a reason for creating incomplete ideas of others’ reality. Next month, I will be intentional about what I spend my time on, choosing to water the grass I want to live on.
4. Summary
I’m not sure if this will help anyone else or do anything positive in the world. But I think for me, writing out a monthly synopsis will be one of the greatest gifts I can give myself this year. Feel free to read them at the end of every month, or not. Really, it makes no difference. I’m learning who I am and who I want to be, and I will work on not letting fear stop me. So, thanks, January 2024. You weren’t a bad January. Let’s see how good we can make February.
